Shelter in Place: Day 45

Hello Everyone,

I don’t feel like writing today. My Grandma Freymiller is in hospice care.

Not COVID-related. Not that it matters, but right now that’s always the first question people ask. As if that would make a difference. As if that will determine how much they care about the situation or me or my family. I know they’re really just trying to make sense of everything but it irritates me.

I’m feeling a little bitter.

I really want to see my family. My standard tactic for dealing with grief is just to share space. Talking if it happens but just sharing space. I can’t do that in person right now.

I was able to participate in a group Zoom call with my grandma today. I got to see her and my siblings and my cousin and my dad and my aunt and uncle. That was really nice. I could tell that my grandma was happy to see everyone. I got to tell her I love her.

She was her optimistic and loving self. I admire that about her.

I don’t know if I’ve said it enough, but I really love my family. I feel so lucky to be related to so many incredible people: my parents, my siblings, my grandparents, my aunts and uncles, cousins, and onward.

That’s all I have to say today.

Love you all,

LAF