Required Viewing to Understand a Freymiller Child

I’m going out on a limb and speaking for my siblings here as well, but these are the movies you’re gonna have to memorize if you want to fully appreciate the complexities of our family.

1) Robin Hood (1973)

Animated classic. Best thing Disney’s ever made. To this day nothing says love like a fox putting a ring miraculously made out of a lily on the finger of another fox. Justice was never better served than by putting Prince John, the Sheriff of Rottingham, and Sir Hiss to work on a chain gang. Sir Hiss has to hold a nail with his tail. Still the best film adaptation of Robin Hood ever.

Ooo-da-lolly ooo-da-lolly, golly what a day.

2) The Hobbit (1977)

This is a great movie and no one and nothing will tell me otherwise. At least, and please come at me if you’d like, it is a far better interpretation of Tolkien’s original than the floppy, fetishistic, over the top, CGI-laden, poorly paced, atrocity of an adaptation that has recently graced the screen. I’m sorry. I just get a little riled.

So the soundtrack to this movie is wonderful and sounds like a hippie fell out of a tree and straight onto a banjo.

3) Watership Down (1978)

You do not know fear until you have looked into the pale glowing eyes of General Woundwort. I fully believe he could take on a cat and win. Other pluses of the movie: “Can you run? I think not.” “Bright Eyes” by Art Garfunkel.

4) Breaking Away (1979)

God, this movie has everything. Young Dennis Quad. Enrico Giamondi. Quotes like “This hole! This quarry hole is ours!” “They’ll keep calling us cutters. To them it’s just a dirty word. To me it’s just something else I never got to be.” “Oh, Dave, try not to become Catholic on us.” “But, sir, they’re not good enough!”

Bike races. Moocher. Love. Cyril.

Indiana has never looked better and probably never will again. I’ll never forget the trip we took down to Indiana University to see the famous stained glass window broken by Cyril’s misplaced bowling ball. I can tell you this much, you watch this film at the end you will not be asking for a REFUND? REFUND?

5) Chariots of Fire (1981)

Just gonna tell you this, I don’t race on Sundays. That soundtrack, though. Is there anything better than “Jerusalem”? Probably not. This movie taught me everything I know about the bitter sting of success. I mean I’ve never really known that level of success, but I assume there’s a bitter sting based on this movie.

Ah it’s so beautiful, though, and the relationship between Liddell and Abrahams really reminds me of the whole Goethe-Schiller thing. The natural talent and the meticulous worker. It’s brilliant.

6) The Princess Bride (1987)

This is kind of a gimme. But a list without it would be INCONCEIVABLE.

7) O, Brother Where Art Thou (2000)

One of my strongest childhood memories is being sent out into the front room every time the cow shooting scene came on. Even now I get a little psyched out when I actually watch it. The Odyssey has always been particularly close to my heart and George Clooney as Odysseus just makes sense.

It’s beautiful. It’s got a great story. It’s bizarre and hilarious and it explains a lot of my sense of humor.

8) Lord of the Rings: Appendices (2003)

Um. We’re big nerds. Don’t know if this needs explanation?

9) Abbott and Costello: Jack in the Beanstalk (1952)

This is a terrible movie. Of all these movies, do not see this one. There’s a bunch of singing. Really bad singing. But I love Abbott and Costello more than is healthy. There’s also this snot-nosed kid in the beginning who is the worst. Oh man. I miss this movie so much.

10) The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle (2000)

Grew up watching the show. Jason Alexander as Boris Badinoff is really great. The main character’s name is Karen Sympathy. Need I go on? It’s pretty darn great. Cartoon becomes live action. Lots of breaking the fourth wall and just terrible terrible puns all the time. Non-stop.

So that should be enough to go on for now. If you make it through this list you’ll probably understand us almost as well as Timmy did. We miss you, Timmy.



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